How to Navigate Being an Empath & Highly Sensitive Person in the Modern Matrix
Learning I am an empath and highly sensitive person was one of the best things that has happened to me and learning how to care for myself as one has helped me become more me.
I used to think there was something wrong with me when I was little and didn't enjoy being around lots of people and noise, unlike everybody else. I'd hate the fact that foods and drinks seemed to affect me so much more than others. I wondered why public transport drained me so much and think I was being weak or pathetic. I felt it when others were in a bad mood and if there was tension in the office, I would feel low for the rest of the day. I couldn't (and still can't) stand small talk, so often used alcohol to help me get through it. I questioned why I was unable to handle seemingly normal day-to-day situations without feeling completely drained. It was like I didn't have control over how I was feeling a lot of the time.
But on the other hand, being sensitive has allowed me to empathise with others. Really feel a connection and understand what they are going through. To offer an understanding ear, to help provide solutions and see their bigger picture.
As an empath, I also often find myself going through heightened emotions and feelings in response to what's going on in the world, compared to many of my peers. I learned, and am still learning, how easily I absorb what's going on around me and how it affects me. I have to remind myself that sometimes the feelings I'm feeling aren't my own and that I need to do things to clear my energy regularly as well as ground myself. Things like meditation and visualisations, walks in nature and showers/baths. But it's actually doing the actions when I'm in the moment of feeling low, which can sometimes be hard.
Can you relate? Are you an empath?
• As an empath you may have been described as overly sensitive.
• You often feel things more than others and can pick up on the feelings and emotions of others as if they were your own.
• Your energy levels can go up and down depending on what's going on around you, or in accordance with the moon cycles and yearly seasons.
• You can often sense what a person is like without even knowing them.
• You find it difficult to say no to others and may find you put others' needs before your own.
• You may find it easy to overeat – as you use food to help ground you or build you up when you feel low and aren't even sure why.
• The news easily affects you and you can feel sad, frustrated or angry at the state of the world.
• You're generally quite introverted and need time alone to recharge.
• You feel at your best in nature and/or with a few close friends with whom you can fully be yourself.
As an empath self-care is so important as it helps with energy levels, not feeling so drained, respecting boundaries, learning to do what's best for your body, mind and soul – and so much more!
It was such a relief learning I am a highly sensitive, introverted empath! Finally, I don't feel so alone. There are other super sensitive and empathic people out there. All the times I thought I needed to be tougher and felt frustrated at my apparent weakness, were futile. I could start to accept and love myself that little bit more.
If you are a fellow empath, I have a little message for you.
The world needs you, in all your empathic beauty, to help it heal.
Yes, it is painful to feel the hurt and sadness that others' experience, not knowing how to process it. Yes, we can absorb negativity and feel emotionally drained at times, which may lead to self-destructive behaviours or numbing to avoid this. We may feel completely misunderstood and that we're alone in all that we experience. It may feel overwhelming, like there is no hope and that there is just too much suffering out there.
BUT there is so much you can give to the world by being you: by feeling all that you do; by being able to relate so strongly to others; by being the sensitive soul that you are. You can use this to offer great compassion, understanding, comfort, healing and kindness. You understand that one person's pain is everyone else's. You know that for us to all thrive we have to be there to support and help one another, we can't continue living in the paradigm of 'me' versus '‘us’'. For the world to truly heal we have to see the love in each other even in the darkest moments. You, as an empath, have this gift within you. Let your sensitivity be your super power and embrace all the magic that it can offer the world.
I'm not saying to put others first and allow yourself to get depleted. But by reaching out to fellow empaths, asking for help, being clear on your boundaries and putting your needs first, you can come from a place of being filled up and will have soooo much to offer this world, just by being YOU. Share your experiences of being an empath, reach out, allow yourself to be vulnerable, as you heal yourself you will heal the world around you.
Love to you all.
About the contributor: Tara is a spiritual being having a human experience. She was born in India, raised in Kenya and has had a lifelong love and fascination of purple elephants.
The above piece is from Tara Jackson’s upcoming book ‘EMBODIED – A self-care guide for sensitive souls’. Tara is a holistic health and wellness coach who works with highly sensitive people and empaths to help them with self-care, reconnecting with themselves and being fully embodied, so they can thrive in today’s world. You can pre-order Tara’s book from her website.
Tara also offers a safe space for empaths to share and connect through her facebook group ‘self-care for empaths’ which you can join here. You can also find her sharing wellness tips, delicious recipes and goodness for the mind, body and spirit over on her Instagram page.